A friend saw a story in the New York Times about a man who is now 81 years old. His children are grown and scattered around the country, and he lives alone since his wife died five years ago. "When people learn you've lost your wife," he said, "they all ask the same question: 'How long were you married?' And when I tell them 52 years, they say, 'Isn't that wonderful!' But I tell them no, it isn't. I was just getting to know her.